From Obedience to Authorship: The Evolution of Moral Maturity

Nephi’s life begins with obedience that looks, at first glance, almost automatic. When his father announces that the Lord has commanded their family to leave Jerusalem, Laman and Lemuel murmur, Sam quietly follows, and Nephi goes to the Lord to seek his own witness. Out of that wrestle comes the line many of us know by heart: “I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded.” Nephi is not simply complying with his father’s orders; he is choosing, from his own conviction, to align his will with God’s.

Later, when Nephi is sent back to obtain the brass plates, the pattern deepens. He begins with a clear commandment but quickly finds himself in a situation where no instructions are given for every twist and turn.

“I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do,” he records.

In that moment, Nephi moves beyond checkbox obedience into something richer: a life authored in real time with God, where his agency, creativity, and courage are fully engaged.

This journey—from “my father has seen a vision” to “I have seen and know for myself”—is the same journey many of us are invited to make.

We start by relying on the testimonies, rules, and expectations handed to us, and over time we are asked to become co-authors of our discipleship: seeking our own revelation, owning our covenants, and acting from an internalized, living relationship with God.

In what follows, we will explore this movement from immature obedience to mature moral authorship, and how it can transform the way we see commandments, agency, and our own becoming.

We often confuse obedience with morality. But what if the path to genuine moral development requires something far more demanding than simply following rules?

The Limitations of Immature Obedience

Obedience can be a necessary starting point—especially for children learning to navigate a complex world. But when it becomes our primary mode of moral functioning, it carries significant limitations:

It keeps us externally oriented. We look outward for permission, validation, and direction rather than developing our own moral compass. Our choices are driven by fear of consequences or desire for approval, not genuine conviction.

It can actually stunt moral growth. Real moral development happens through exercising agency—making choices, experiencing consequences, and learning from trial and error. When we simply follow external authority without question, we never develop the internal capacity to navigate moral complexity.

It can become unhealthy. Immature obedience can lead us to comply with harmful systems, suppress our authentic needs, or abandon personal responsibility. We become characters trapped in someone else's script, unable to recognize when the script itself is flawed.

• Obedience as foundational, but voluntary and developmental: “We came to earth to prove [our] willingness to do all things whatsoever the Lord [our] God shall command” (Abraham 3:24–25), and “obedience must be voluntary.” This supports your idea that rule‑following is an early necessary stage, not the whole goal.​
• Obedience that becomes internalized: Jeremiah prophesies of a covenant where God will “put my law in their inward parts, and write it in their hearts,” moving from external law to inward conviction (Jeremiah 31:33; echoed in Hebrews 10:16).

Doctrinal nuance:

• “It can actually stunt moral growth,”
  • “When obedience is driven only by fear or social pressure, it can stunt moral growth” here I'm critiquing distorted obedience, not the principle itself.
  • “not obedient because they are compelled…[but] because they know certain spiritual truths and have decided…to obey.”​

The Power of Self-Authoring

Self-authoring represents the mature expression of agency. It's not about rejecting guidance or choosing isolation—it's about becoming the conscious author of your inner narrative, values, and meaning system.

Here's what shifts (as we mature in our understanding of Self-Authoring Agency)

• From: "What should I do?" (external authority)
  • To: "What do I believe is right, and why?" (internal authority)
• From: Following rules to avoid punishment
  • To: Living by chosen values that reflect genuine understanding
• From: Being shaped by others' expectations
  • To: Consciously choosing what to keep and what to release

As one definition puts it:

"Self-authoring is the capacity to live as the conscious narrator of your life rather than a character trapped in a script written by the past."

Why Self-Authoring Matters

When you author your own values and positions, you develop authentic motivation—not just compliance.

This internal authority is what "drives your capacity to do challenging but meaningful things."

True agency vs. mere compliance: D. Todd Christofferson taught that God

“is endeavoring to make us independently strong,” able to act for ourselves “even in the dark,” using agency to choose God’s will from a place of understanding rather than compulsion.

[God] is endeavoring to make us independently strong—more able to act for ourselves than perhaps those of any prior generation.
We must be righteous, even when He withdraws His Spirit, or, as ... President Young said, even “in the dark.”

Moral Agency

By using our God-given moral agency in the way that Jesus Christ exemplified, we don’t become God’s puppets—we become like Him.

Brigham Young UniversityD. Todd Christofferson

That dovetails with “reaction → choice → meaning → authorship"

A self-authoring person can:

• Feel emotions without being controlled by them
• Revise beliefs that once protected but now limit
• Choose values even when they conflict with approval
• Say "this happened to me, but it does not define me"

This isn't ego dominance or making up your own reality. It's choosing alignment over impulse and meaning over conditioning.

How to Develop Self-Authoring Capacity

The movement from obedience to self-authoring follows a progression:

Reaction → Choice → Meaning → Authorship

Here's how to cultivate it:

1. Practice Conscious Reflection

• Pause before responding to ask: "What do I actually believe about this?"
• Examine inherited beliefs: Which still serve you? Which have you never questioned?
• Notice when you're seeking permission versus making authentic choices

2. Develop Your Own Position

• Move from "What does everyone else think?" to "What is my considered position?"
• Find truth through your own experiences, not just accepting others' interpretations wholesale
• Build your framework for understanding life through genuine engagement
• Have your own spiritual experience of recognizing truth for yourself.

3. Take Responsibility for Your Choices

• Own your decisions and their consequences
• Learn from mistakes rather than just trying to avoid them
• Recognize you're responsible for what you do with what happened to you

4. Hold Influences Consciously

You don't have to reject:

• Family expectations
• Religious or cultural traditions
• Past experiences
• The need for connection

Instead, you hold them consciously and decide by choice, not fusion.

5. Build Internal Authority

• Create internally-generated principles rather than only following external rules
• Develop the capacity to think, "I know who is choosing, why, and from what higher intention"
• Let your choices flow from genuine understanding, not fear or obligation

The Deeper Transformation

Self-authoring doesn't mean you never listen to others or reject wisdom from tradition. It means you engage with these sources as an author, not a character.

You move from being unconsciously driven by:

• Trauma responses
• The need for validation
• Conditioning and scripts you never chose

To consciously choosing:

• The story you tell about yourself
• The lens through which you interpret events
• The values that guide your decisions
• The identity you act from

The Invitation

True moral development isn't about perfecting obedience—it's about developing the courage to think, choose, and define yourself authentically. It's about becoming someone who can navigate complexity with an internal compass you've consciously crafted.

The question isn't just "What should I do?"

The question is "Who am I becoming, and am I authoring that becoming—or am I letting it be written for me?"

Who am I becoming?
Am I authoring that becoming?

This is the profound shift from immature obedience to mature agency. It's not easier. But it's the path to genuine moral growth, authentic spirituality, and a life lived from the inside out.

What script have you been living?
And what would it mean to pick up the pen yourself?

based partly off podcast
Reconciling Spirituality from Dr Jennifer Finlayson-Fife
https://finlayson-fife.com/podcasts/conversations-with-dr-jennifer/post/reconciling-spirituality-and-sexuality